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Weddings are exciting. We witness two people who have fallen passionately in love confess their love in front of friends and family. Fast forward a few years and life often gets in the way. We let the monotony of our daily responsibilities cloud our hearts and loving our spouse becomes a bit more difficult. How can you bring the spark back in your marriage and make your husband feel loved? Here are 6 ways….
Know His Love Language
We often love how we want to be loved. Then we get frustrated when our gestures aren’t reciprocated.
Get to know your husband from the inside out. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been married 10 years, 1 year or 5 minutes.
Sometimes we love our husbands the way we want to be loved. We think we’re doing a good thing, but we’re completely missing the mark. For example, my husband loves to be affirmed and love physical touch. I love when he helps me around the house & with the kids (act of service)
Encourage Him
One of the benefits of marriage is that you have a built in encourager. Is your man confident? Does he often brag about his skills?
That doesn’t mean that he doesn’t need a little encouragement–we all do.
If you don’t know where to start, find a happily married couple that would be interested in mentoring you. There’s no shame in asking for help!
Listen to Him
After a long day, he wants to vent. You just want to put the kids to bed and crash. It’s hard to listen sometimes when you feel like your own needs are not being met–either by your spouse, or the craziness of parenting.
Healthy communication is the key to any healthy relationship. Do you struggle to communicate because you are tired after work? Do the kids interrupt every time you try to have alone time?
Sounds like it’s time for a date night! Schedule some time to be alone without interruptions. Can’t get away for date night? Then make time for each other once the kids are in bed. Spending time together allows you to grow together instead of apart. Learning each other’s love languages is vital to keeping the spark alive.
Thank Him
Thank your husband for the little things. Like getting up with the kids so you can get an extra hour of sleep.
Or washing your car unexpectedly.
Sometimes we don’t want to thank them because we think that they don’t deserve thanks for what they should be doing. But, everyone deserves to be appreciated.
And your hubby will probably be motivated to help you more if he knows you are grateful.
Touch Him
This goes without saying. But doesn’t always have to be sexual (although I’m sure your husband would appreciate it if it was!).
You can kiss him before he leaves for work.
Give your hubby a backrub after a workout. Hold his hand at the movies.
Brag on Him in His Presence
Tell your family and friends what a good husband you have. It’s so easy to complain. Complain about what he’s not doing, or how he hurt your feelings. But we have to remember that marriages are sacred. And people remember the bad stuff we tell them, even when we are just venting.
Let’s be honest, some of you don’t want to do these things.
Maybe he has been a jerk to you lately.
Have you stopped and asked why?
It’s hard to make him feel loved if you don’t feel loved yourself.
The funny thing about love and affection though is that it has a way of being contagious. Far too many people give up on their marriage too soon.
I promised you these would be easy ways to improve your marriage! WIt’s never too late to work on your marriage. You vowed to be together for life. So why not live a happy life together?
Kelly says
Bragging on him is such a great one! My husband and I have different love languages for the most part, but we share “words of affirmation”. Thanks for the reminder to speak our language 🙂
Diedre says
I was reminding myself too Kelly!
Ashley Peavey says
Love this, thank you for the reminder!
Diedre says
Thanks for stopping by Ashley!
Krista Nile says
Love languages are SO important!!! Once we figured ours out, our relationship changed for the better!
Diedre says
Yes, isn’t it amazing how one little tidbit changes the whole marriage game?
Fatima says
YOU two aren adorable! I love these tips 🙂
Diedre says
Thank you so much. He’s a keeper.
Brittany says
These are great ways and I so agree with them! My husband’s love language is physical touch! He always wants to feel appreciated so I say thank you a lot to him. Great post!
Diedre says
Thanks Brittany, I have to practice my own advice sometimes.
Patricia says
This list is full of great reminders! It’s so important to know what speaks to him and not the things that I would want for myself. I definitely need to be reminded to encourage and thank my husband more for all that he does.
Danielle says
Such good tips!! My love language is affirmation, and pretty sure my husbands is touch. I remind myself that.
Diedre says
It’s always good to have a reminder every now and then!