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Raising Biracial Kids in Today's World

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5 Questions Every Mom Asks Herself After Having A Baby

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The hardest part of postpartum life is returning to life as you knew it.

As you are thrown into your new role, everything around you seems to change and at times can feel very overwhelming.

The hardest part of postpartum life is returning to life as you knew it. Having a baby changes your body, mind & emotions.

Having a baby changes your body, mind & emotions. It often leaves you asking questions and doubting yourself.

Questions like…..

Should I catch up on housework or sleep?

This is a question I ask myself every weekend.

After my son turned 4 months old, I returned to work. After being a stay at home mom for four months, I was thrown back into the chaos of mothering and working outside of the home.

The hardest part of postpartum life is returning to life as you knew it. Having a baby changes your body, mind & emotions.

It seems like I can never catch up on laundry and there are always dishes in the sink.

Cooking dinner often takes hours because I’m stopping to breastfeed in the middle or break up a fight between my daughters.

If the baby is napping, I feel guilty about sleeping myself. 

There have been times that I laid down to nap, but stayed awake thinking of all the things I could be doing.

But after so many days of not getting sleep, I crash. So now I work some, sleep some.

The hardest part of postpartum life is returning to life as you knew it. Having a baby changes your body, mind & emotions.

If I don’t get sleep, I’m no good to anyone. Not even myself. 

When will I be myself again?

Spending hours of snuggle time with your baby can sometimes make returning to work difficult.

The hardest part of postpartum life is returning to life as you knew it. Having a baby changes your body, mind & emotions.

How can I get my husband to understand how I feel?

If I have a newborn, obviously I’m not getting much sleep. And those moms who brag about their babies sleeping 6-7 hours at night? I hate them.

Lack of sleep=being cranky

Being cranky=I’m not the most fun to be around

Getting back on the same page with your husband after having a baby is tough.

There are so many challenges that are present after having a baby like physical complications from childbirth, embracing your postpartum body, juggling a new baby along with older children, not desiring sex, and lack of sleep just to name a few.

Sometimes we make assumptions about our spouse. We think that they should know how tired/hungry/aggravated we are.

Living with a newborn can be taxing, so it’s important to communicate how you feel with your spouse. Don’t assume that he knows how you feel.

The hardest part of postpartum life is returning to life as you knew it. Having a baby changes your body, mind & emotions.

How  do I embrace my postpartum body?

I love fashion, but every time I leave the house, I am usually making a mad dash in and out of my closet. I pick something that resembles and outfit I wore before baby that

A. doesn’t need to be ironed

B. doesn’t look like I stuffed myself into it.

I often get frustrated because even though I can fit into my pre-baby clothes, they don’t fit the same.

My squishy mom belly sits under my pants and finding clothes that don’t accentuate my mid section are always challenging.

Shopping with 3 kids presents a challenge, so now I do most of my shopping online. One of my favorite places to shop is Jane.

With all the Daily Boutique Deals, I can always find clothes that are high quality, fashionable & affordable.

Could my baby be any cuter?

Through all the sleepless nights and frustrating moments, at any given time, your phone is now full of pictures of your baby. You might look rough, but those toothless selfie pictures with you and baby always bring a smile to your face.

Looking into the eyes of your little one reminds you that all the sacrifices you are making are for a good cause.

Babies don’t keep, so soak up all those sweet little moments, even when they keep you up at night.

The hardest part of postpartum life is returning to life as you knew it. Having a baby changes your body, mind & emotions.

Give yourself some grace mama. Having a baby is a beautiful blessing, but it also changes you forever. The way you look at life (and yourself) is different. Motherhood changes you, and it takes time to adjust to the new you.

 

 

3 Ways the Postpartum Period Distances You From the World

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Having a baby and becoming a mother is one of the best things that has ever happened to me, however the postpartum period has been somewhat of a challenge.

Having a baby is an exciting, joyous occasion. For the mother, the postpartum period can also be a confusing transition period emotionally, physically & mentally.

This last pregnancy was especially emotional for me due to a previous miscarriage.

After finding out I was having a boy, I found myself getting more and more excited the closer I came to my due date. I was excited about meeting my baby boy, and being able to enjoy some parts of life that I had to alter while pregnant. Things like sleeping on my stomach, having a glass of wine and being able to tie my own shoes.

Having a baby is an exciting, joyous occasion. For the mother, the postpartum period can also be a confusing transition period emotionally, physically & mentally.

My son was born on March 26, 2018. When he was five days old, I was diagnosed with Bells Palsy. The right side of my face began to droop and my right eye watered constantly from staying open.

Having a baby is an exciting, joyous occasion. For the mother, the postpartum period can also be a confusing transition period emotionally, physically & mentally.

The Bells Palsy diagnosis was frustrating because out of my three pregnancies, I felt like my recovery period was progressing the most smoothly.  I suffered a little postpartum depression with both of my previous pregnancies, so I worked hard to avoid some of the things that I knew could contribute to postpartum depression.

I made sure to shower daily (okay, let’s be honest..with a newborn..hmm.. at least every two days), get out of the house and get dressed even if I wasn’t planning on going anywhere.

Those things did help, but during the postpartum period, you are naturally distanced from the world. The late nights, constant diaper changes and feedings have you in a whirlwind. You can barely keep up with the day.

You hate and love company at the same time

Having people over means you have to get dressed. And you want the house clean. But you don’t have the energy to really care about either one.

After my bells palsy diagnosis, I was embarrassed. I didn’t want people to see my face. I was afraid because of my droopy face, I might spit or drool.

 

Having a baby is an exciting, joyous occasion. For the mother, the postpartum period can also be a confusing transition period emotionally, physically & mentally.

But guess what? People came and it made me feel good to have adult conversations. No one made me feel bad about my face. And they brought food!!

You don’t want to share the baby

Days and nights are long. And they run together.

People offer to help, and you want/need help, but you are afraid they won’t do it like you. You know that this sacred baby time will pass, and you want to soak up every moment.

If you are returning to work, you know that someone else will witness most milestones before you.

For that reason, you hold the baby as much as possible. You refuse the offers for relief. The moments that you should be asleep are spent staring lovingly at your baby.

Most of your affection is reserved for the baby

You want to have enough affection to go around for everyone, but the truth is that you are too tired.

Not only are you tired, but your body is crashing from the crazy emotional high.

The postpartum period can be really difficult for husbands. They don’t understand why their wives have an unending supply of kisses and snuggles for baby, but can often be short and withdrawn from them.

My husband and I have discovered that while I am healing, intimacy can be found in more than just the physical. We steal little moments to laugh together and talk about our day.

We still try to steal kisses too. 

Having a baby is an exciting, joyous occasion. For the mother, the postpartum period can also be a confusing transition period emotionally, physically & mentally.

We also tag team parent our older children together which cuts down on either of us feeling overwhelmed and burned out. We take turns spending time with our children separately and together.

Having a baby is an exciting, joyous occasion. For the mother, the postpartum period can also be a confusing transition period emotionally, physically & mentally.

In the moments when I feel down about the postpartum whirlwind, I look at my son and realize that this stage is only temporary. One day when my children ask what it was like when they were babies, I think my mind will drift back to the tender moments, not the sleepless nights and challenging days.

Having a baby is an exciting, joyous occasion. For the mother, the postpartum period can also be a confusing transition period emotionally, physically & mentally.

4 Simple Skin & Hair Tips for Biracial Babies

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I became a mom to a biracial baby for the first time in 2011.

I never really thought about how caring for her skin or hair would be different from my own–until I had to.

If you are a parent to a biracial child, finding the right hair and skin products can be a challenge. Biracial babies often need products that provide their hair and skin with more moisture.

When she was about six months old, her straight dark hair changed into a head of beautiful brown curls. I had been using Johnson & Johnson’s baby body/hair wash on her hair.

Her hair started to look dull and frizzy, and one day after a bath a terrible rash was all over her body. After a frantic visit to the pediatrician, I discovered that many brands are not safe for infant (or anyone’s) skin.

At that point, I started paying more attention to the ingredients in the products I was using on her hair and skin.

Fast forward to now and I have 3 beautiful biracial children.

If you are a parent to a biracial child, finding the right hair and skin products can be a challenge. Biracial babies often need products that provide their hair and skin with more moisture.

Gentle & Natural

After my oldest daughter’s outbreak, I began my search for gentle products for her skin.  Now with three biracial babies, I even pay attention to what I wash their clothes in.

If you are a parent to a biracial child, finding the right hair and skin products can be a challenge. Biracial babies often need products that provide their hair and skin with more moisture.

I used the thinkdirty app (FREE!) to scan items in my home to determine if they were safe for my children. I was amazed at how many everyday products contained harmful chemicals. Don’t believe me? Download the app & see for yourself.

Moisturize

All three of my biracial babies were born with very dry skin. It was red and peeled for the first month. The doctors and nurses suggested washing only once a week, because soaps can be drying to an infant’s skin.

If you are a parent to a biracial child, finding the right hair and skin products can be a challenge. Biracial babies often need products that provide their hair and skin with more moisture.

However, when you are intentional about choosing products that are made with all natural ingredients, you don’t have to worry about drying out their skin.

If you are a parent to a biracial child, finding the right hair and skin products can be a challenge. Biracial babies often need products that provide their hair and skin with more moisture.

My two favorite products to use on my newborn’s skin are castille soap and Young Living Seedlings baby products.

If you are a parent to a biracial child, finding the right hair and skin products can be a challenge. Biracial babies often need products that provide their hair and skin with more moisture.

My son loves when I use the baby oil on him. He feels like he is at the baby spa!

Protect

Babies have such delicate skin, so it is an absolute necessity to protect it from the elements (wind, sun, etc). There are so many products on the market now to keep babies protected from the elements.

The rule of thumb for dressing a baby is to dress them to the comfort level of your own. If you are cold, they probably are too. If you are hot, then they are probably sweating too.

If you like to take the baby out for a stroll, use the covers on the stroller to keep the sun out of their eyes and from burning their delicate skin.

Baby wearing is also a helpful way to protect your baby. If you are going to be out in public places, baby wearing keeps people from touching the baby and it limits exposure to the elements.

If you are a parent to a biracial child, finding the right hair and skin products can be a challenge. Biracial babies often need products that provide their hair and skin with more moisture.

Keep Hair Routines for Biracial Babies Simple

My girls both have beautiful curls and I’m pretty sure my son will have curls too (right now his hair just curls on the ends).

If you were to ask me a simple routine for my girls hair, it will be difficult to narrow down.

For biracial babies, your routine should be simple. They don’t need a ton of products to define their curls. A simple wash will keep it clean and minimal products are needed.

As your child grows and their hair grows, applying a small amount of leave in conditioner can help moisturize and define their curls. Using products free of parabens, silicones and sulfates ensures that your baby will not come in contact with chemicals that are often found in various products.

 

 

Self Care With A Newborn: What Does That Look Like?

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Caring for a newborn baby while recovering from childbirth can be a challenge.

Juggling the constant demands of a new baby (feeding, clothing, bathing, changing diapers, etc) and making sure that your needs are met as well can feel utterly impossible some days.

Juggling the constant demands of a new baby (feeding, clothing, bathing, changing diapers, etc) and making sure that you indulge in self care can feel utterly impossible some days. 

With my last two children, I made them a priority. I put self care and my marriage last.

That led to (quick) burnout.

Going into this pregnancy, I knew that this would be my last baby. I didn’t want to end my baby years on burnout, so I made a decision to do things differently. Everyone warned me that having another child would mean a little less of me going around.

Juggling the constant demands of a new baby (feeding, clothing, bathing, changing diapers, etc) and making sure that you indulge in self care can feel utterly impossible some days. 

I understand the demands that parenting places on us, but honestly sometimes the demands that we “fall short of” are unrealistic ones that we put on ourselves. Having children does not mean that we have to run ourselves into the ground.

Finding out you are pregnant after suffering from a miscarriage doesn't elimate all the fears. It can be challenging to move forward.

Here are a few ways that self care can exist….even with a newborn in tow.

Rest

Ya’ll, I’m preaching to the choir. 5 days after giving birth, I was diagnosed with bells palsy. At 3 weeks postpartum, half of my face is still numb. One consistent piece of advice I’ve been getting is to rest.

Simple enough right?

Bells palsy comes from the stress your body goes under in pregnancy and/or childbirth. It’s tough to rest when you have a newborn right?

If you are like me, you see that there is always something that needs to get done. Resting means that you care enough about your body to let those things go. It will get done.

Personal Appearance

I love some pjs and leggings like most moms. I love that leggings are forgiving on my body while I slowly make my way back into pre-pregnancy clothes.

I have no shame throwing on something comfy and running into the store—that is until I run into someone I know and then I’m embarrassed about my appearance.

Now I’m not saying that you have to put on a full face of makeup and dress like you’re going on a dinner date, but taking a few extra minutes to spruce yourself up before leaving the house will do a number for your self-esteem and crashing hormones.

Self Care= Finding Joy

What brings you joy??

Juggling the constant demands of a new baby (feeding, clothing, bathing, changing diapers, etc) and making sure that you indulge in self care can feel utterly impossible some days. 

Losing sleep for nights on end can turn you into a crazy person (if you let it).

Instead of obsessing over the things you haven’t done, use this time to do things that bring YOU joy.

Finish a book that you’ve been dying to finish.

Get a manicure & pedicure.

Diffuse your favorite essential oils. My favorites are from Young Living: Gentle Baby, Joy & Lavender.

Let Go of Unrealistic Expectations

Before bringing baby #3 into the world, I already struggled. I struggled with balancing the role of a great mom, wife and employee. I struggled with having my home look immaculate at all times.

After bringing home my son, I was faced with a few health challenges. Resting my body meant letting some things go.

I’ll admit it. I’m pretty stubborn.

The one thing I’m not willing to let go of is laundry. It piles up all on its own and you can never seem to catch up. So I do a lot of laundry. I don’t always fold it or put it away, but I try to do a few loads every day (or every other day).

The rest of the household chores come when I have the energy. Or if someone offers to help, I let them.

I finally let go of the guilt. I’m not perfect.

And Super woman does not exist. Realistically, my children will grown up and learn to pick up after themselves. Keeping my home neat is a priority, however running myself into the ground, losing sleep & stressing over every detail is not.

Juggling the constant demands of a new baby (feeding, clothing, bathing, changing diapers, etc) and making sure that you indulge in self care can feel utterly impossible some days. 

There are so many ways that busy moms can indulge in self care. The important thing is to make time for yourself so that you can be your best you for your family. Let go of the mama guilt and find a way to take care of you today!!

What’s your favorite way to self care?

I Had a Normal Pregnancy & Then I Woke Up With Bells Palsy

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Having a healthy pregnancy, baby & complication free delivery is a blessing. Sometimes though, complications like bells palsy appear after baby is home from the hospital.

Having a healthy pregnancy, baby & complication free delivery is a blessing. Sometimes though, complications like bells palsy appear after baby is home from the hospital.

A few weeks ago, I had my third baby.  A beautiful baby boy born on the Monday before Easter.

Having a healthy pregnancy, baby & complication free delivery is a blessing. Sometimes though, complications like bells palsy appear after baby is home from the hospital.

I had a normal delivery. And recovery seemed to be going well.

Having a healthy pregnancy, baby & complication free delivery is a blessing. Sometimes though, complications like bells palsy appear after baby is home from the hospital.

Day 4 I was snuggling with my daughters and even did a load or two (or four) of laundry.

Having a healthy pregnancy, baby & complication free delivery is a blessing. Sometimes though, complications like bells palsy appear after baby is home from the hospital.

 

Bells Palsy Symptoms

Day 5 started a little strange. My right eye felt like something was in it all day, and my lips just wouldn’t align straight when I tried to put on chap stick.

My face felt like it was going numb and I just assumed that it was an allergic reaction to medication. I’m a glass half full kind of girl, so when my family started throwing around the words bells palsy, I refused to look it up for myself.

They had to be wrong.

By the end of day 5, my right eye would not close completely and it watered all night long. At that point, I started to get concerned.

Day 6 was Good Friday and my doctor’s office was closed. They advised me to go the ER. I was devastated. My husband drove me so he could stay outside with the baby. When you have a brand new baby that you are breastfeeding, the baby has to go everywhere you go. Since the ER is filled with germs, our plan was to text if he needed me and I would run out and nurse him.

Doctor’s Office Visit

Thankfully I was in and out of the ER in an hour. I hobbled in with one eye watering and told the intake nurse my story. I had only been discharged two days prior and my eye was watering so profusely that he handed me a tissue and quickly got me to the back.

The doctor on call gave me a quick look over and said it looked like I had bells palsy. He sent a nurse in to do some bloodwork just to rule out other things–and before you know it, I was discharged with several new prescriptions to take.

The following Monday, I met with the PA in my obgyn office and I heard those words again, “bells palsy.” I was so overwhelmed by details that I couldn’t stop the tears from falling. She asked if I was depressed. Then asked my husband to confirm.

Last January I had a miscarriage and was very depressed, so I knew this time that was not what I was faced with.

I was just mourning my face. 

Having a healthy pregnancy, baby & complication free delivery is a blessing. Sometimes though, complications like bells palsy appear after baby is home from the hospital.

I never knew that I was attached to my image. I had to come to grips with the fact that my face could potentially be stuck like this for another month or two.

I considered telling all of my friends not to visit. 

I was embarrassed and didn’t want anyone seeing me this way. With half of my face temporarily paralyzed, I could feel a lisp when I spoke and frustration when my food and drinks fell out of my mouth.

Having a healthy pregnancy, baby & complication free delivery is a blessing. Sometimes though, complications like bells palsy appear after baby is home from the hospital.

How I’m Coping

My mom reminded me that people wanted to see me, and check up on me. They would not be concerned about how my face looked.

So on Saturday, I mourned my face. I cried in the bathroom for about 30 minutes. I finally admitted to myself that my face is important to me, and that the situation really sucks.

After I had a good cry, I decided that I was going to move forward.

I decided not to let the temporary situation steal my joy. I had just delivered a beautiful, healthy baby boy. My girls are obsessed with him and want to hold and touch him every chance they get.

I was blessed to have him so close to the end of the school year that I don’t have to return to work until the end of the summer. I can’t waste four months of maternity leave stressing about what I can’t change.

At 3 weeks postpartum, the right side of my face is still temporarily paralyzed. I still drool on myself if I drink without a straw. But, I’ve mastered the art of the half smile. When my four year old asks me if I can smile yet, I say no and change the subject.

Having a healthy pregnancy, baby & complication free delivery is a blessing. Sometimes though, complications like bells palsy appear after baby is home from the hospital.

The stress that childbirth puts on your body can often affect the speediness of your healing. But it doesn’t have to affect your spirit.

If it happens to you, remember to seek medical attention immediately and that this situation is temporary.

If your eye doesn’t close and continues to water, get a sleep mask or eye patch the reduce the stress of the open eye. Your doctor can also prescribe eye lubrication to keep your eye from drying out while you are using your reserve tears (who know there was such a thing?!)

Drink through a straw and take small bites while eating to minimize your frustration of food and drinks falling out of your mouth due to the paralysis.

Take all the help you can get from family, friends, neighbors and church members. Allow your body time to heal and minimize stress as much as possible.

 

Having a healthy pregnancy, baby & delivery is a blessing. Sometimes though, complications like bells palsy appear after baby is home from the hospital.

 

Bringing Home Baby: Welcome to the World Baby J!

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On March 26 ,2018, the Anthony family welcomed Julian Mark Anthony! He was  7lbs  1oz & was born at 8:26 a.m. via c-section. Our little family is officially complete!

Mommy & baby are doing well.

Bringing home a new baby from the hospital is always an exciting occasion, especially when you already have children and are adding to your family.

His sisters are over the moon excited! My oldest has a different experience than when we introduced her sister into the picture. I think it helps because she is so much older. I’ll naturally have 2 little helpers! It was a little disappointing that his sisters couldn’t come to the hospital. Due to the huge flu outbreak, the hospital is keeping babies safe, so no one under the age of 18 was allowed past the waiting room. We had to get creative and let the girls see their brother through the parking lot window.

Yesterday was an exciting day because our family of 5 was reunited!

Bringing home a new baby from the hospital is always an exciting occasion, especially when you already have children and are adding to your family.

Having a baby in our family is like a holiday. It’s a wonderful occasion that brings both sides together. Our children are so blessed to have grandparents that get along.

Bringing home a new baby from the hospital is always an exciting occasion, especially when you already have children and are adding to your family.

Part of me is a little sad that my husband’s father isn’t here to celebrate with us (he passed in 2015 after a long fight with dementia). He would’ve been excited to meet his grandson. We also had several other family members who passed recently who would normally have been visitors at the hospital.

The reality of having 3 kids hasn’t hit me yet, but I’m glad that my mom is here to help out. I was a little nervous about going through the baby stage again, after all it’s been 4 years! But like my mom said, it’s like getting on a bike again. Some things you just don’t forget-like how to love!

Bringing home a new baby from the hospital is always an exciting occasion, especially when you already have children and are adding to your family.

Breastfeeding is going well, but I’ve forgotten how much the first week hurts!

I was hoping that my milk would come in naturally on it’s own, but just in case it didn’t, I packed some lactation bars and I’ve been snacking on them at home too.

I’ve been blessed to be able to nurse all 3 of my children. I can’t wait to share some tips on breastfeeding with you.

I know that things will be more chaotic, but strangley, I’m okay with that. Growing up as the oldest of four kids, chaos is what I know, (hated at times growing up), but LOVE when my siblings and I all get together.

I’ve been a girl mom for 6 years, and now I’ll be learning what it means to be a boy mom. One of my goals for Juilan is to not push him into stereotypical gender norms. I’m sure his sisters will help bring out his softer side.

Thank you all for your well wishes & I can’t wait to share more about our family of 5!!

 

 

If You’re Being Honest, There Are Moments When You Don’t Like Your Kids

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Don’t get me wrong. I love my kids. I dote over things that probably make you roll your eyes over.

I still talk baby talk to my youngest even though she’s four. But if I’m being totally honest, sometimes I don’t like them.

You probably feel the same way, but you feel embarrassed to say it.

So I’ll say it for you. Sometimes you don’t like your kids.

I think it’s okay to admit. We admit that we don’t always like our boss, our parents, our spouses and family members. Why not our kids? I still love them, but there are times that the things they do really annoy me.

Motherhood is a beautiful adventure that some days can turn into a disaster. Kids can try your patience and if you are being honest, there are moments that make you not like your own kids.

Here are a few things that really make me dislike my children:

When They Ask Me Crazy Questions on Repeat

Is Thidwick the moose a boy or a girl?

What happens if I go too far in the ocean? Will I die? Will you be sad? Will Jesus be happy with me when if I died and went to heaven with him?

Do bugs swim? Do they like to swim?

How can a snake bite with no teeth?

When They Ask Me for Things as Soon as I Sit Down

There must be something that we eat while pregnant that causes this. I’ll prepare dinner for everyone and try to anticipate anything they’d ask before I sit down to ensure that I can stay seated for at least 3 minutes without interruption.

One kid asks for more milk, and I ask the other if they need anything while I’m up. The answer is always no. Occasionally, I’ll start cleaning up the kitchen while I’m up, knowing that someone will want more of something.

When everyone seems satisfied, I return to my plate. And then tragedy strikes.

Suddenly, EVERYONE NEEDS SOMETHING.

This is enough to make steam come out of my ears.

When They Work Together to Be Mischievous

Oh, you know, drawing on the wall. Putting water in their play kitchen.

Using the toilet brush for whatever (denying it, but you know it was moved from the usual location)

Stealing things out of your room. Puting your makeup sponge in the bath and pretending it is soap. The list goes on and on. You know that they are doing normal kid stuff, but it still leads to those moments when you don’t like your kids.

Motherhood is a beautiful adventure that some days can turn into a disaster. Kids can try your patience and if you are being honest, there are moments that make you not like your own kids.

Talking Back

“But mama, I’m not talking back, I’m explaining”

Sure, she’s only 6, but she’s got that back talking down. I’m trying to nip it before she becomes a teenager.

There’s something about talking back that makes the hairs on any parent’s neck stand up straight.

When They Take Advantage of Me

Right now I’m 9 months pregnant. My feet are starting to swell and I have to admit I’m hobbling around now. My husband is a farmer, so he usually gets home after all the crazy has hit an all time high.

Motherhood is a beautiful adventure that some days can turn into a disaster. Kids can try your patience and if you are being honest, there are moments that make you not like your own kids.

 

When I’m sitting with my feet up, they find some way to get into a fight or have a meltdown that requires me to get up.

If I’m trying to make an appointment on the phone, talk to customer service or handle something important, it seems as if an alarm goes off inside them telling them to interrupt me (LOUDLY).

It’s enough to make me lose my marbles and not like my kids.

Motherhood is a beautiful adventure that some days can turn into a disaster. Kids can try your patience and if you are being honest, there are moments that make you not like your own kids.

 

What can you do to avoid a meltdown yourself??

In those moments when you feel overwhelmed, take a break. Go into another room and take a breathe. Or tap yourself out of parenting for a bit and call your spouse in for reinforcements.

If your spouse isn’t around, throw the kids in the car and go for a ride.

Call a friend. Pull up a (kid friendly) video on YouTube and have a dance party.

Don’t allow yourself to sink and lose control. Some days that’s easier said than done, but it’s absolutely necessary to preserve your mental health and sanity.

What Goes In Your Hospital Bag The Third Time Around?

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This post was sponsored by NursElet, but all opinions are my own.

Packing a hospital bag the third time around seems like it would be an easy task after already doing twice with other children. There are a few essentials that you don't want to forget--I've got you covered!

Just four years ago, I was in the hospital having my 2nd daughter. She was supposed to be born on a Monday, but came on her own on a Friday. Thankfully I had time to swing by my house to get my hospital bag, but this time my hospital bag will be traveling in the truck with me.

Packing a hospital bag the third time around seems like it would be an easy task after already doing twice with other children. There are a few essentials that you don't want to forget--I've got you covered!

My girls are only 2.5 years apart, so I knew exactly what to do to prepare.

Four years doesn’t sound like an incredibly long period of time, but when you are talking about babies, it can feel like the stone age. My kids are both school age and potty trained and can do a significant amount of tasks on their own.

 

Packing a hospital bag the third time around seems like it would be an easy task after already doing twice with other children. There are a few essentials that you don't want to forget--I've got you covered!

They actually can play together long enough without fighting (most days) so that I can nap.

Now that baby #3 is on the way, I’ve felt a little nervous about adding a baby to the mix–and a boy!

Packing a hospital bag the third time around seems like it would be an easy task after already doing twice with other children. There are a few essentials that you don't want to forget--I've got you covered!

My mom tells me it’s just like getting back on a bike, but there’s so much to remember, like what to put in my hospital bag.

I have most of the basics, but believe it or not, I had to check out a few  checklists to make sure I wasn’t missing anything. I’m pretty type A, so I packed my hospital bag a few months ago, but I’m putting the finishing touches on it to make sure I haven’t missed anything.

This time around my house is 2 minutes away from the hospital, but who wants to be inconvenienced when you’re already there? I’m also having a c-section, so I want to be sure I include all the essentials to keep me comfortable.

Hospital bag essentials for me:

Nursing pillow: This is the first time that I’m bringing a nursing pillow to the hospital. When babies are little, they often nurse for long periods of time. It’s so much easier to have a pillow to prop your arm up against, especially in those first few days after birth when you are already worn out.

Pjs: Having pjs that are nursing friendly is extremely important.

Nursing bras/tops: If I don’t feel up to putting on pjs after the surgery, I can just slip a robe over my nursing bra/top & voila! Instant comfort + nursing accessibility!

Slipper Socks: After a c-section, it’s mandatory that you walk around, so slipper socks keep my feet warm (and clean) while I’m walking up and down the hospital halls.

Toiletries: (toothbrush/toothpaste, soap, mouthwash, scarf for my hair): Call me picky, but my husband and I are particular about what products we use on our skin. I’ll have my own handmade soap on hand and all the beauty products I need to feel clean and refreshed after delivery.

Snacks: To me, hospital food is definitely no where near home cooked food. My family will be popping in and out and I’m sure they’ll bring me things to eat, but while I’m waiting, I decided to pack a few of my own favorite snacks this go round.

Diffuser/oils: Why am I putting oils in my hospital bag? Well, I’m the mom that says, “There’s an oil for that.” I’ve been reading the Gentle Baby book and brushing up on the best oils for postpartum and baby. I want to feel relaxed while I am recovering, so you better believe I’ll be diffusing oils in my room, starting with Lavendar, Gently Baby, Patchouli just to name a few. Want to learn more and start your own natural, oil journey? Click here.

NursElet: This little bracelet is a name changer. How many of you have ever nursed, took a nap, then forgot which side you nurse on last? I can’t tell you how many times that happened to me. Those moments of amenesia will now be a thing of the past thanks to NursElet. It also fastens your shirt up to instantly turn it into a hands-free nursing or pumping shirt, even if it wasn’t designed that way.

Packing a hospital bag the third time around seems like it would be an easy task after already doing twice with other children. There are a few essentials that you don't want to forget--I've got you covered!

Hospital Bag Fun for the Kids:

A gift for my girls: To celebrate their transition into being big sisters, I am bringing a gift for each of them. This will help them feel significant in a moment that many kids need reassurance. I am the oldest of 4 kids, and I remember feeling left out after my first baby brother was born.

A dry erase board/markers: They will be in school during the day, but I’m sure they will want to spend a few hours in the hospital room with us. At 6 & 4, I am anticipating that their attention span will wane in the room. The excitement of a new baby brother will wear off, so I’m bringing an activity that will keep them busy (and hopefully out of trouble).

What would you add to the list??

Want a NursElet for yourself or for a friend? It makes the perfect shower gift! Use my code: ARETHOSEYOURKIDS10 for 10% off your entire order until March 31st on www.NursElet.com

 

 

4 Rules Every Pregnant Woman Should Adopt ASAP

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*This post contains Amazon affiliate links, which means I may receive a commission if you click a link and purchase something that I have recommended.

The first time I became pregnant, I read everything I could get my hands on. I had What to Expect When You’re Expecting on my nightstand and could barely wait for Baby Center to email me the update of what fruit or veggie my growing baby looked like.

Slowing down and taking care of your body is the best gift a pregnant woman can give herself while you are carrying a new life.

I also pushed myself too hard. I tried to continue all of my regular task without letting pregnancy “hold me back.”

Now I see how foolish I was being. Slowing down and taking care of your body is the best gift you can give yourself while you are carrying a new life.

I think the miscarriage I had last January aided in my ephiphany. If I could go back to my previous pregnancies, here is some advice I would’ve given myself:

It’s Okay to Rest

I know. I’m guilty of not resting. My husband jokes that I nest my entire pregnancy. He’s partially right. I’m very type A and I want things done in a timely manner (basically when I want it done).

I have a hard time waiting on my hubby to help. But honestly, you are growing a tiny human. There are times that your body will force you to rest, even if you try to resist.

So take it from me, a third time mom, just rest.

Slowing down and taking care of your body is the best gift a pregnant woman can give herself while you are carrying a new life.

Do As Much As You Can In the 2nd Trimester

The first trimester is always rough for me. This pregnancy was truly the roughest because baby boy made me feel naseous…..alot. The things I normally love made me sick.

On top of feeling sick, I was also extremely tired. The first trimester sleepy (a phrase I made up entirely on my own) always hits me hard.

This summer, we sold our house and moved into another.

On top of that, I started a new job and found out I was pregnant.

Slowing down and taking care of your body is the best gift a pregnant woman can give herself while you are carrying a new life.

After getting over the first trimester ick, I started working on decluttering and fixing up the nursery. My family thought I was crazy since we still have so much time, but I know my body.

Now that I’m in the 3rd trimester, I’m experiencing back aches because baby boy sits so low. The sleepiness has also returned. I’m typically not out of bed before 10 AM on the weekends. My girls even ask me why I sleep so much. So take it from me–utilize your energy in the 2nd trimester.

Pair Those Extra Snacks With Exercise

This is my last pregnancy and I promised myself that I would stay in shape. While I’ve fallen off the fitness track a little, I try my best to stay active. I take my kids to the park, we run around the farm (which is a few acres), and I don’t always park in the closest space in the parking lot.

Unfortunately, the pregnancy weight doesn’t just magically fall off after having a baby.

My husband is a farmer, so my exercise comes from being on the farm with my family. Walking around collecting eggs or playing with the kids is great because most of the time I don’t realize how much I’ve been walking until I go home and sit down. Find something fun to get your blood pumping and your body moving!

Take Time to Reconnect With Your Husband

Adding a baby to the mix doesn’t exactly aid in the romance department. Postpartum life can be rough. Sleepless nights coupled with all the other stressors of adding a newborn to your household often puts your love life on the back burner. Take some time to go on dates with your love before the baby arrives.

Spend time nurturing each other and speaking each other’s love language.

My husband and I went on a babymoon for our anniversary. Being out of town away from the kids helped us remember why we feel in love. If it wasn’t for my lack of energy after walking around the town, I would’ve forgotten that I was pregnant. Having these sweet times together will sustain us through the transition of bringing home baby and “normalcy.”

Slowing down and taking care of your body is the best gift a pregnant woman can give herself while you are carrying a new life.

When you read books & articles about pregnancy, there are so many “rules” that moms should follow. I’ve found that the best rules for a pregnant women are the ones that keep them healthy, rested and happy.

 

Why I Want My Biracial Children To Be Aware of My Blackness

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When we go out in public, people frequently comment on my children’s physical appearance.  My blackness is put on display as their minds search for an answer to my children’s appearance. Some people are brave enough to ask, and some make general comments.

 

As a black mom raising biracial kids, I do not want them to be "colorblind." I want them to be aware that their mother's blackness means something different than being biracial.

As a mother, it has always brought a great sense of pride when comments are made about their beauty. As they age, I now begin to wonder if the compliment have deeper meanings.

As the compliments are given, I often notice that people scan me. They scan my hair, my finger for a ring, and my face. It is subtle, but it’s happened so often, I am used to it.

As a black mom raising biracial kids, I do not want them to be "colorblind." I want them to be aware that their mother's blackness means something different than being biracial.

As they are ogled for their skin complexion, “They are so lucky they don’t have to tan” and their curl pattern “I wish I had hair like that” it makes me wonder if the compliments are more due to the fact that people are drawn to their exoticism. I don’t share their complexion, and my blackness does garner the same type of attention.

At six and four, they are beginning to notice the endless compliments. They are not at the point that they can connect it to race, but one day they will.

As a black mom raising biracial kids, I do not want them to be "colorblind." I want them to be aware that their mother's blackness means something different than being biracial.

In fact, my six-year-old has asked me why people always say they are beautiful. I simply tell her, because you are.

As they get older, I know the questions will be directed at them-especially when I am not around. They may be asked by peers and adults why don’t you look like your mom?

I want my kids to know that they have the option to not discuss our family’s racial identity if they choose not to.

Research shows that kids see race by the age of 5. However, the biases that come along with an observation come from the adults around them.

As a black mom, I worry about how my kids will feel when they discover that racism and discrimination is still alive and well.

How will they feel know that this is still very real for ME? How can I protect them from discrimination based solely on my interracial marriage? 

 

As a black mom raising biracial kids, I do not want them to be "colorblind." I want them to be aware that their mother's blackness means something different than being biracial.

I know that I can’t shield them from all the bad, but motherhood has given me that desire.

I worry about how they will internalize slavery. In our home, our conversations don’t center around race, but instead we discuss things that are alike and different about us.

For now, I feel that is an age appropriate conversation for them. But I want them to understand that life for others may be different from the life they have.

I want my kids to know a world without boundaries based on their skin color. For them, that may come a little easier because they are light-skinned. That sounds terrible to say, but it’s the absolute truth.

Making my children aware of my blackness is not just about me, but about having empathy for others around them. Having empathy doesn’t always mean that you agree with someone who is different, but that you can have enough compassion to listen to their story without diminishing their experience because you haven’t experienced it.