I love having daughters. I always wanted a sister (and didn’t get one) so this is the next best thing. I feel like I was meant to do this. However, there are definite joys & challenges to raising little girls. Growing up in a home dominated by testosterone, I’ve been on a learning curve raising daughters.
As I walk through the grocery store, I often get smiles as people compliment me. And then comes the dreaded, ” You have two girls. You sure are going to have your hands full.” Having two young children close in age keeps me hands full. But what specifically makes people feel sorry for parents of daughters?
Here’s what I’ve discovered:
The joys: Sass. On our way inside work, one of my middle school students held the door for Melody & I. I said, “Thank you dear.” To which Melody replied, “Mommy, is not a deer.”
The challenges: Channeling that sass. It does get old at times, but I know it’s part of her personality. I have to teach her how to be appropriate and speak her mind, but not be offensive. I must teach her to be respectful to adults and not sarcastic. I know some adults that haven’t mastered this yet.
The joys: The fashion. Fashionistas. Need I say more? What’s more fun that shopping for yourself? Shopping for a miniature version of yourself!
The challenges: At two & four years old, my daughters often tell me what they do or don’t want to wear. For some reason, I imagined this coming much later in life. Sometimes I acquiesce and allow them some say so, and other days it’s an all out cry fest because they didn’t get to wear what they wanted. So sue me! The nice thing is that I can still get such great deals. The challenge in that is not overspending!
The joys: Teaching my girls self-respect.
The challenges: Countering over-sexualization. Sex is everywhere. In commercials. On social media. On magazine covers. It’s a challenge to teach my daughters that beauty can take many forms other than physical attributes. Beauty can come in the form of brains, kindness, humility just to name a few categories. As they grow, I will have to fight against the sexualization machine.
The joys: Reliving all the girly things I loved as a child. This is even better because all the 80’s movies and toys are making a comeback! (Pound Puppies, Care Bears, Strawberry Shortcake, Baby Alive, Cabbage Patch Kids, Puppy Surprise) I have to exercise serious self-control when we peruse the toy aisle. Please tell me I’m not alone!
The challenges: Spoiling too much. It’s easy to give your children the world. I want them to be grateful and humble for the things they have. If I don’t allow them to work hard for anything, they won’t value the things I give them.
The joys: Watching them grow into independent, intelligent young ladies. It’s every parent’s greatest joy to watch their children grown into independent young adults that can fend for themselves in the world. Watching them make new discoveries is quite mind-blowing.
The challenges: As much as it brings my heart joy to watch my girls grow up, it also brings me pain to know that as each year passes by, they aren’t babies anymore.
What do you enjoy about being a mother of a daughter? If you are raising a son and a daughter, what differences do you notice?
Missus Layam says
Haha at “deer.”My daughter says the funniest things too. Sometimes I think she’s older than her real age (she’s six). She is also a little fashionista. She wears a tiara ALL DAY.
dacounsel says
Funny! I always say my oldest is 4 going on 14. Glad to hear someone else understands 😉
thecrunchymommy says
oh man i feel like you just wrote my life story raising little girls right here!!!! there are soooooo many joys AND challenges especially when you don’t want to crust their little spirits. such a fine line to walk.
dacounsel says
Great point! Yes, we don’t want to crush their spirits, but try to balance making them strong and assertive. Glad you could relate!